Daily Photos

There was a time a few years ago, when I set myself the goal of taking a picture a day, partly to help me keep focused on what happens in a year of my life.  

I like the idea of taking a photo looking for the beautiful things of life.

I also like the idea of taking a photo so you remember the beautiful things of life.

May 17

May 18

May 19

Here are some other nice photos from the week. 

Lilies of the Valley, because they are my favorite flower.

Christian wanting me to read him a story. 

Christian took this, and did a pretty good job, too!

Because little girls and kittens are just too cute.  

April's News

Last year I was looking after Lorene's boys full time, so I don't have as many stories and photos.  I keep up with the boys are doing this month, by snitching photos off facebook.  

And watching their football games.  We like to support our grandchildren, but the first football game we were able to watch was in 40 degree temperatures and 30 mph winds.  You couldn't wear enough clothes or have enough blankets to be really comfortable.  Christian was so miserable, 

he and I watched in their van at a distance.  

During that time, it was just as enjoyable to watch Barry play, alone with a football, his own game.  I could tell by his actions; his tackles, passes, catches and touchdowns.  I don't know if beautiful is the right word here, but anytime I see a kid playing with only his imagination, it stirs my heart.  

There are a lot of interesting things you can do in this life and obviously one of them is watching ostriches race.  I never heard of such a thing, and especially not in our state, but here is proof.  

I wasn't the one watching any big racing birds, but my grandkids were.

Spring is here, more or less.  It's been chilly, warmish, windy, snowy, cloudy and rainy.  

I sure would like to see a bit more sun. 

These Scilla are some of the earliest flowers that come up.

We like to buy small trees from our NRD, they are less expensive that way to plant in the windbreak/screen we are making on the south side of our property.  Jim bought several red oak trees this year with the idea to plant some at the farm to eventually replace the green ash trees that eventually will be killed by the emerald ash borer. 

So, we went out to the farm to plant trees.

We also planted several acorns, burr oak, I think.  

The following photos don't really show what I saw and what I wanted to tell. 

This first one is a picture along the dry creek on our farm where we planted most of the little trees. 

We had major flooding in a large part of our state due to snow, frozen ground and lots of rain.  We didn't think our property was affected, but you can see trash caught in these trees.  The creek is about 6-7 ft. deep and the grass in the branches is above ground level. 

Water running through here must have been 3 ft. deep judging from the trash clinging to the branches of that fallen tree. 

Jim cuts wood here and then tosses the small branches in piles near the creek bed.  We don't realize how powerful water in until we've seen what it can do.  We've got a little dam going here. 

Same place, same idea.  That's a nice sized log that the water tumbled down the creek. 

Jim planted a peach tree last fall, and it is blooming.  We are hoping for a few peaches this year, but we've had several frosts while the blooms were on, which kept Jim rushing out to spray the tree with water before sunup. 

I kept the drawings on this white board for a good 5 or more years, because it was cute.  It makes more sense to use a white board as it is intended so I took a photo for posterity's sake. 

Boys.

And more boys.

And chicks...

...which we need more of like a cat has two tails.  

We already have about 20 hens and get anywhere from 12-16 eggs a day.  

We had Zane overnight in April and I made chocolate waffles.  I've been making up some recipes I've saved that I actually thought I would want to use.  This recipe is a bit fiddly, having to separate eggs and whip egg whites.  The finished product was beautiful, but deceiving.  People expect chocolate things to be sweet.  This wasn't.  It is supposed to be treated like any other waffle, with syrup or whipped cream.  Zane treated his with ice cream and sprinkles.

Our resident turkeys.  I wonder if they will be a nuisance in the garden this summer.

Make Time For Joy

I read an article in the Reader's Digest a while ago called "Overtaken by Joy."

It describes the condition of life when something is so beautiful that it is

"exultation of spirit" and "exquisite joy".

The author wrote her own moments, and moments of friends and commented that those moments come rarely in our lives because we are too busy to find them.  

I'm looking at my photos and finding some that remind me of days of "exquisite joy."

You know, those days when the sun comes below the clouds 

in the evening  and turns everything to gold.

Or walking down the road in the glory of gold and green and red with the

 "bright, blue sky" above in October.

To watch the sun rise on a clear day, so turn from midnight blue with red around the edges to gold and pink and azure, until the sun blazes up in a glory of light in ever changing blueness.

Then there are the days where the sun shines so brightly on the ice on the branches of trees so they look like they are glazed, and I forget that ice is damaging.

And those few days with a perfect fall of snow, coming down like a white veil, obscuring the view except for the nearest houses.

Tonight, looking back at an especially nice photo book I made for my daughter when she was 15, pushed me over the top.  It was made for all the right reasons.  A little snapshot of her life so far, and encouraging words to help her go on. A remembering time of baby days, and school days, and preparing for adult days.  It is exquisite joy to think of the making of the book and even more so to think of the making of a life.

May it be so. 

Snowy February

February is nearly over and I am sitting in my favorite place, the couch in front of our huge picture window with the fire burning on this cold day.  

Outside our world is white.

These pictures taken a couple weeks ago are before our two days of 6" snows, plus another 4" earlier this week and another 2" last night.  

It isn't as cold as it has been.  Earlier this week we had lows and highs in the single digits.

We've had more snow this month that we've had for the last couple of years I think.  

We were expecting another snow dump today but it isn't happening so I see Jim driving around the neighborhood in his skid steer cleaning off the neighbor's driveways.  

A very little color in the landscape.

Hoar Frost. 

Your Loss Is My Loss

We went to a funeral last week.  

A lovely woman married to Jim's second cousin finished her course 

far earlier than anyone expected.

My heart hurts--for the family who lost a wife, mother, grandmother, aunt,

for friends who no longer know her companionship

for me because after surviving cancer I'm full of mixed up emotions.

I want to write great words of comfort and sympathy, but all I can feel is heart sore. 

I came across this in an advice column and thought it was apt.

"...showing up as a witness to someone else's loss is a vital expression of our own humanity."

Is It Aging...

...or Radiation?

We all know that growing old isn't for sissies.  I just didn't expect it to start so early.  

Of course, having cancer and aggressive treatment exacerbates the aging business, 

at least I feel it does.

Anyway, I went to the eye doctor early this month.  I have been having problems with my left eye for at least six months including wavy lines, small print and a spot in the middle.  When I talked to the nurse at the eye doctor’s in Oct, I felt she rather pooh-poohed the issue and said call if it gets worse.  It didn’t, so I made an appointment for a regular check-up and since my doctor is in high demand, I went in the second week in January and she acted a bit startled that the nurse told me it wasn’t a big deal.  Long story short, after a whole bunch of pictures, there is fluid in my macula (which is the stuff right dead center in the eye) and she wanted me to see a retina specialist to find out what was the best thing to do for it. That bump in there is causing the above mentioned problems.

 

I saw the retina specialist yesterday.  My eyes were dilated, and a whole bunch of other drops put in, dilated again and after another whole bunch of pictures, the Dr. comes in and says the fluid is gathering there because a blood vessel is blocked.  (This could be because of the radiation or because I’m over 50.) And, there is nothing to do about it, permanently, anyway.  What does get done, is an injection to stop the swelling.  IN.MY.EYE.  So, what to do.  Do I leave it be and let the other eye take completely over in the reading department and will there be other problems?  So, after a few more drops, one for numbing and other that does something to the eye that make the needle go in more easily, my eyelids are propped open by some little tool and away he goes.  I felt the pressure, but no pain.  What bothers the most is the “making it easier” drop which stings for several minutes. 

 

After making appointments for my next two shots, 4 weeks apart, we went to Walmart to restock my eye drop supply and get some gel for night time. Then I sat on the couch feeling slightly miserable and more than slightly sorry for myself, while putting in drops to relieve the itchy feeling in between naps.  My dilation didn’t go down until bedtime, so the light from our big front window wasn’t very comfortable.

 

I won’t have pictures every time, maybe not until my third appointment.  I’m hoping when the pictures aren’t taken, I won’t have the dilation to worry about and it won’t be as big a deal.  In other words, I should be able to do normal things in between drops.  It’s hard to see with pupils dilated and a bit painful.

Just another misstep in my journey.

What will be next?  

A New Year With a Glance at the Past

The First of January --

This is the time of year that many of us reflect on the previous year, look toward the next, 

and write a few resolutions. 

I'm not making many resolutions.  A long list tends to failure.

I have a few goals in mind, but not set in stone at the moment.

I didn't give last year my best, and I want this year to be different.  

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The end of the year is a special time in our family.  

Zane was born the last day of the year, and this year he turned 10.

My first grandchild is in the double digits.  

He's changed from a little boy to a big one.  

He loves to read and play board games.

He loves computer games and his tablet.  

This year he wanted me to make his birthday cake.  

He wanted a layer cake--4 layers.  

At first he wanted black frosting, but we talked him into Lego blue.  I had the idea then that I would put primary colors in between the layers and went looking for red paste food color, forgetting what time of year it is , but there was none.  

I found red frosting and knowing I had yellow, green and blue colors at home I was set to go.

I have four 8" cake pans so I carefully measured the batter so I could divide it evenly between the four pans.  It sure looked like 4 cups in the big measuring up, but after I put the first two layers in the oven, another cup of batter in the third pan, ...

and there wasn't a cup to put in the last pan.  So, I divided what batter I had between the last two pans and had layers of different sizes.  

I used some things called "bake evens", adjustable heavy cloth thingys you dampen and put around your pan so the cake doesn't rise up in the middle and you don't have to waste a lot of cake cutting off the top to even it out.  That worked, if not like a charm, satisfactorily enough that when I piled them up, my cake only leaned slightly.  

The trouble began after I frosted and stacked the layers and began on the royal blue color I wanted for the outside.  

Being the messy, not picking up after myself cook that I am, I had various colors and powdered sugar and utensils scattered over my counter, and carefully adding the blue paste, noting that I didn't have any too much to begin with. So, I keep adding and mixing and adding and mixing and not looking what I was doing grabbed the green paste color and got this ---

Teal

And no more blue coloring.

I went into town to Walmart and no paste blue color.

No gel primary colors.  Was I going to have to buy the blue, brown, black and some other color I don't remember just now, to get my blue?

Then I saw a torn box of the primary colors and carefully holding it together purchased it and got in into the house and there I discovered I lost the red color.  

Thankfully, I didn't lose the blue.

This was as good as I could get. 

I'm sorry I didn't get the blue I wanted, but circumstances and ineptitude were against me.

I put some cocoa in the teal frosting hoping it would look more, er, edible, but to no avail.  If you eat it with your eyes closed, it's good.

What to do with it?

The only suggestion I've received is to use it in graham cracker cookies.  You won't be able to see the color that way.  

Zane decorated it, and we ate it all up.  

Happy Birthday, Big Guy!!

It's a Blizzard Out There!

We are having a regular blizzard today.  

When it's windy like this we can hardly keep the place warm, so much cold air comes in around the windows, so Jim and I are sitting in front the the fireplace.  

I was knitting and Jim was napping, but now I'm blogging and he's video watching.  

He can find all sorts of things to watch, from building houses to cooking food to restoring

"B" John Deeres.

We may be in but the birds are enjoying the feeder. 

This is just the right kind of day to make doughnuts.  

But, I won't.

There aren't enough people in this house to eat them anymore and I don't want to risk anyone's life to take them anywhere or have people come to get some.  

The days are gone now when all the kids were home on a snow day and we would eat fresh homemade doughnuts until we were sick.  

Or, at least I would.  

My dad was a teacher so a snow day meant all of us were home together.  

That's where I learned to make, and eat, doughnuts. 

Making doughnuts now means planning a time when we are all together or a day when I can deliver them.  

I think Jim and I will make candy instead. 

It's Snowing Today

It's snowing today.  

It's been snowing since we got up in the dark.  

We are expecting a a big storm resulting in lots of snow.  

I was out early.  I couldn't resist.  There wasn't much wind and the it was snowing heavily.  

I went out and scooped a path to get the paper.  I scooped the very wet half inch of the stuff off the sidewalk and a shovel width to Jim's shop, just for fun, since he had joked about it.  '

There isn't much to do outside at my age.  The snow is too heavy and wet to even think of attacking the driveway, unless I want to be laid up with back problems.  

So, I walked "around", which is what we call the half mile circle running through our little neighborhood.  

I have always enjoyed being out in the snow, especially when it's "perfect," which is was this morning.  Heavy snow, little wind, 33 degrees, perfect. 

If that temperature dips a little more, there will be a mess out there.  

Ice, covered with who knows how much snow.  We are getting predictions above 8".  

The storm seems to have settled in above us to snow itself out. 

The wind is picking up a bit and snow is falling off the trees which is a good thing, as the evergreens have been sagging under the heavy, wet stuff. 

I came in soaking wet to hang my coat by the fireplace.

Jim likes this way to spend a snowy morning.  

He has since gone out to out shop to paint tractor parts. 

I Can Hear Again!!

Yesterday we spent the day in Omaha.  There might be more exciting things to do there than have two doctor appointments, but that's the way it was.  

I am now on yearly oncologist's visits and I passed that one with flying colors.

We planned on visiting Valentino's for lunch, when we got to the one we usually visit, it has changed into a party room place, but if we went next door to the carryout/lunch counter we could get a coupon to use for the buffet at another place.  So we did.  After stuffing ourselves we went shopping.  I prowled around Good Will, looking for a pair of brown boots and a brown sweater and finding none, I found myself eyeing a nice little backpack purse in far better shape than mine.  While I was debating someone else was making up their mind, and it was gone, so I came home with nothing.  Jim however was spending company money for an air hose reel, which he needed, and then after a little comedy in the parking lot, where I couldn't find our car without Jim hollering at me, even though it was right in front of me, we were off to the ENT clinic to get my BAHA.

I saw the doctor for just a bit while he inspected the post site for healing around the post and tugged on it to test how well it was grown in, then it was off to the audiologist for a long lesson on the BAHA, and it's accompanying equipment.  It was programmed after a little hearing test which proved I can't hear much of anything as the device is set to it's highest volume. Then we found out how to take care of it, use the batteries, which batteries to buy, how to store it, how to clean it, how to take it on and off, and not to get it wet.  It seems like we talked about lots of other things, that I can't really remember, but we asked lots of questions and felt like we understood everything we needed to.  

Whether we will remember it all is a different story.  

Now, my brain has to get used to a louder world.  Everything is louder; I can hear things I haven't heard for 5 years.  I can hear the toilet paper unrolling, and the fridge running.   Flushing, Jim's slippers on the floor and the dryer are too loud.  Crinkling plastic bottles, clinking silverware and setting plates on the table are just plumb annoying.  This the the time for my brain to relearn what it wants to hear and what it doesn't.  It takes awhile, anywhere from 10-12 weeks.  

It's not so bad, it's nice not to have to be right next to Jim to hear him.  

I think I'll get used to this new, louder world sooner than I expected.