Saturday, February 27, 2010

Got Phone, Will Talk

Phones are a way of life.

Whatever would we do without them?

Probably a lot more....





you know the drill.

Who wants to get up and answer the phone when you're in the middle of crocheting that afghan for the next person who gets married around here.

I really don't like answering the phone when I'm busy, since most of the time the person on the other end wants to sell me yet again some fancy pants insurance, or travel bonuses, or "spend some more money and we'll let you have free interest for two weeks" or whatever for 9.95 a month, free 30 day trial and if you forget to call after the 30 days, start charging you for something you didn't want in the first place. I can't get off the phone fast enough.

Use call waiting, you might say. I don't have call waiting. I'm not going to pay 3.95 a month for the phone to tell me something I won't know until I pick it up since these people block the number anyway.

The bank called me the other day and offered me $100 to try something or other, for a monthly charge, cancel after 30 days, make sure you call in on time, blah, blah, blah, and I didn't take it. It isn't worth enough to me to remember to call back. It's my policy, I take no offers. Some things aren't worth it at any price.

Now maybe a couple hundred dollars....

I don't like to call anybody on the phone either. My heart pounds and my hands get numb, and, I have to call quick without thinking or general disintegration sets in.

Must be my age, I didn't walk around with a phone sprouting from my ear when I was growing up. Phones weren't toys, that as soon as you don't have anything to say you could type a little code and let everyone know about it.

Goodness, I could go weeks, while school was on and not talk to anybody on the phone that was in the kitchen and everyone could hear what you said!! (We did have a long cord that would reach into the hall, for the few times I was a "normal" teen.)

Enter the age of cell phones....and a new age of evolution.

The human race is suffering from a mutation that occurs at adolescence or a little sooner in prosperous families. The first symptom is a whine that grates on the ears of the adults in the household taking the form of something similar to "but everybody else has one, why can't I have one, you can call and find out where I am whenever you want."
Soon, the afflicted teen or pre-teen is seen growing a shiny tumor out of one hand that is most comfortable held up to the ear or with both hands, the thumbs frenetically moving to alleviate the most serious symptom of all. I NEED TO TEXT MY FRIENDS!!

In our household this serious disease is already taking hold on the smallest persons in the house.

Zane was actually "talking" to Lynette on the way home from snowboarding. It took him a while as he was blabbering away, to realize he was holding Gramma's phone in his hands, and it would be much cooler to push all the buttons and call Estonia.


The J's said...

Amen sister!
I bet we could write a book on this subject!!

gkey said...

This is the best!
You could send this into the newspaper, and I bet they would print it. Well, I would if I were the editor.