September Hair

This is what I look like when I'm not ready for a picture.  

It also is what I look like when I haven't combed my hair.

It is also what I look like when I go visit a person in a burn center.  That was a new experience for me.   A new friend of ours was badly burned with hot water when he was working and is now recovering in the hospital.    

I feel the urge to write again.  I am enjoying these lovely blue and gold days of fall.  I am sorry that my deck plants have completely died after being gone four special days.  I have no idea how to keep them alive.  They have to be watered twice a day in the heat of summer.  I lined those coconut shell liners with plastic bags, no luck.  

I tried diapers over the plastic bags, still no luck.  I think if I had some half moon plastic liners that fit right in, it would help, but I can't find any.  

I'm about ready to clean the deck up and take the geraniums in that managed to survive.  

I'm just no good at plants that need to be watered on a schedule.  I just don't do schedules well at all.  My mini garden died, out on the deck. Half of my mini succulent garden died, in the house. My favorite plant is the eternity plant I got for my birthday this year.  It thrives on neglect.  Sigh.  The only reason my flower garden lives is because it is on automatic sprinklers. 

I made a pumpkin pie yesterday.  I put yogurt in instead of the milk.  Not an acceptable substitute if you like Libby's recipe.  I remember now I had other plans for the yogurt.  My sister in law makes her own yogurt, and then makes her own ranch dressing with it and a packet of mix.  I though I would try it with store bought.  I imagine if you had your own mix of herbs and spices you could do it without the package.  

Now I need more yogurt.  

Sometimes less is more...

have a good day. 

The Tuesday Muse

A week later...

My title idea is somewhat borrowed from a fellow blogger, but it fits what I feel like today.  I don't have any great message or photos, but I feel like writing.  

I have had the privilege of some very special days that I haven't had for over a year.  They are a reminder of all I hold dear and inspire in me a desire to do a better job of living.  

However, it also wore me out.  I see that I can go on with stimulation and food for several days, but home again, it was like walking around in a fog.  I went to bed early, as a resting place for mind as well as body, the two days I've been home.  I've also done very little around the house.  Unpacking and laundry are being done a very little at a time.  Office work, 15 minutes at a time.  I have piles of both waiting for me as I get rested up.  

I nap in the afternoons.  

I am trying to get the more important things out of the way first.  

At the end of last year, I made the debatable choice to be the treasurer of the theater booster club since no one was taking the job and I thought I could handle it.  I can handle it, but I am wondering about the responsibility of handling the money.  And of dealing with the politics involved.  Actually, there is going to be no dealing of that with me, I'm going to keep my mouth shut.  

Of course, since I started this post last week, and more exciting life has intervened during that time, I can't remember what I had to say.  Probably nothing that amounted to very much.  

I just really wanted to show these pictures of the snake.

I don't know what the deal is with these snakes.  The last one I saw was hanging out in the grape vine.  This one is hanging out by the mailbox, so when I get the mail.

!!!!

See his little head sticking out?

I had a moment with an entirely insane thought of poking him to see if his head would go into a better position.  I don't really mind snakes, I just don't like to find them under my feet. 

I was making homemade pancake syrup the other day, having washed and prepared jars and lids and filled them.  It wasn't until I tried to put a lid on THIS jar and it didn't fit that I realized it didn't have threads.  WHAT KIND OF A JAR IS THIS!

It looks just like half of my jelly jars.  I have no idea where it came from.  It looks just like a jar,  having a lip, under where the threads would be.  

Is it a vase?  Did flowers come in it during my treatment?  Did it ever have some kind of lid and come with food in it?  I have no idea, no memory of ever seeing this before.  It seems too nice to get rid of, so I put it in the cupboard.  It is now a glass.

Freshly canned homemade pancake syrup.

And what post of ordinary days would be complete without of photo of two young Bronco fans.  Not that I care anything about the Broncos, but their folks do.  I just love this.  

Big brother and little brother.  

A Happy Boy

A little boy spent his time at my house today.

A happy, smiling, talking boy.  

He bounces in his seat, he rolls on the floor, he grabs rings, he chews his socks (on his feet).

He is a a lot happier here than he would be at the zoo with the rest of the family.  He'll enjoy the zoo more another year.   

This is what we did today.

Smiled.

Chewed on toes.

Helped with Laundry.

Grabbed Rings.

Took a nap.

Found a new toy.

Took another nap, this time in Papa Tom's crib.

Rolled back to tummy.

Helped fold clothes.

I know at almost four months he doesn't have a lot of control, but it was nice to see him roll over and grab for toys.  Everything he can get goes into his mouth.  He spends a lot of time just kicking around. He doesn't cry much either, only when he's wet, tired or hungry.  

He's the smiliest baby I know.

And I love him.

Today I Am Tired

But not too badly.  I had some tea mid-afternoon to make sure I stayed awake.  

It was a beautiful day. I went to look after my grandsons at their house since Zane is now in Pre-K while my daughter had another class day.  I hoped we could have a decent day with a minimum amount of mess while carrying Christian around.  

And we did.  

I wish I could have taken more pictures.  But I didn't.  I didn't have enough hands.  Especially, when the perfect picture opportunity was at hand, I was carrying a baby, a water bottle, a child's hand, and no camera.  The camera was at the house.  

I wrote a little piece several years ago when my children were little and I didn't have a camera to hand one summer.  I wrote of all the things they did that I didn't have pictures so I would have a memory anyway.

  Today was like that.

It was a perfect fall day.  The sun was shining, the air was soft, there was no breeze.  We walked down to the mailbox, I suppose a quarter-mile, Zane pulling Barry in a plastic sled over the somewhat asphalt, mostly gravel lane leading down to the highway.  We meandered, we looked at rocks, at sunflowers, at golden rod. The boys ran. Is there anything more heart warming than to look down the lane, to see golden heads enjoying the day, their little legs carrying them along. For them life is happy, there are no worries, they are just enjoying being out, being able to run, knowing Gramma is watching.  

Coming back up that quarter-mile was pretty exhausting.  Especially since it was the second time we were over that road in three hours.  My arms were tired, but as we could see the house, Barry says, "hand", and we walked up the hill together.  

Barry alone with me (Christian doesn't ask for the same kind of attention), made sure I noticed him.  He wanted to play a game, told me to "sit", taps my head with an "uck", and then says, "oosh", realizing we were playing duck, duck, goose, I grabbed him, he was satisfied and the game was over. (He's a one word man).  He also stuffed his favorite "croc-a-dilly" into Zane's backpack and wanted me to zip it up, which I willingly did.  After a bit, he came to me with the backpack asking for a kiss, which I gave him, and he was ready to go 'side, to go to school.  I told him to go into another room and pretend, and that game was over soon, too.  What a cutie.  

Zane and Christian.

August Hair

I've discovered some things about my hair.  Maybe these things are true about everybody's hair.  I just know that BC, my hair was very easy to deal with.  I just tossed it up into a french roll, and if it got messy or fell down, I could just do it again wherever I was.  I was happy with it.

NOW...

the stuff is not the same on both sides of my head.  One side is definitely thinner, and it shows. And it slumps. One side curls very nicely, and if you look at that side it looks like I have very nicely behaving hair. 

It isn't so bad to deal with, really, and I can wet it and mousse it and fluff it up a bit, and call it good.  I do like to make sure the front is waving nicely, the way I want it, because it will wave not too nicely, the way I do not want it, if I don't.  

The strange thing is that now I see my mother in the mirror, because her hair waves this way.  Mine didn't used to.  

On the sinus front.  I still deal with mucus issues, and I have a feeling I may be dealing with them for the rest of my life.  However, since a year ago, I was just out of the hospital after a week's ordeal, it's not so bad. I just went back to read some of those posts, posted by someone else other than me.  Someone who was watching me struggle with pain and mucus and mouth sores.  Ugh. 

It hurts to think about those days, but it's nice to think about those who were standing by, helping me when I couldn't help myself.  

On the eating front.  I ate a hamburger last night,  ON A BUN!!  Actually, it was only half a bun, and a homemade one, and that "tastes" better.  I didn't really enjoy getting the last half down, but  stuck to it.  I need the nutrition.  I mean, eating real food is really boring. Usually, it is soup, soup, soup. (I like my soup, I make it myself.)  If it isn't pretty wet to begin with I have to drink to make sure it is.  Then it needs chewed and chewed and chewed.  I don't have the saliva to help with the breaking down process.  I enjoyed the sensation of eating it, but hamburger is rough, and it was hard on the inside of my mouth, which is still pretty tender, since I AM going to eat things at times that hurt it and when I get tired it is sore, too.    

I'm really not healed up on the inside.  I enjoyed (I'm not sure that is really the word I want) looking over the August 2012 posts.  The encouragement, the struggle, the people, the comments, the fact that it's OVER--that's the best part.

P.S. On another front, I am not losing weight anymore, and I may have gained a little and I still don't taste sweet things.  

Random Baby and Kid Photos

I am a Gramma.  These photos prove it. 

They also show who is the newest kid on the block.

It also means I'm too tired to blog.  

Enjoy!

New baby Christian.

Christian 3 mos.

First haircut at 18 mos.

Lunch at Gramma's.

Uncle Tim's famous tie dye onesie.

Look at that boy lift himself up!

A Good Clean Out

As those of you who are my facebook peoples know, I recently cleaned out my furnace room.  Again.  

I've done it before.  I hope I won't have to do it again. I didn't mean for it it get that bad, but for way too long I just threw things in there or put them on the floor until it was piled up with just a path to get to the freezer and closet.  And even then if something slid off the pile, it was stepping over STUFF.  It was pretty bad before I was diagnosed with cancer.  I had big plans to really clean up that room and the rest of the basement and was eager to start.  Well, that train derailed and I finally found the energy to tackle it a little at a time.  It took me at least a week, and with the last trip to the Good Will this morning, it is done.   

I tried to be ruthless in my tossing, some things I couldn't remember why I saved them.  Some things were trash, some things I had too many of. I didn't get rid of everything I should have but I got rid of enough to have a place for everything that belongs there and a little room left over.  

I wondered, why is it so hard to get rid of things? So, I've been thinking of why I kept some of the things that I got rid of, and why I kept them in the first place.  

The piles of boxes, mostly shoe boxes.  Why do I like to keep them?  I think it is because they are such sturdy boxes with well fitting lids.  I kept them in case I would give a gift in them.

I use gift bags.  

Gone.

Jars that aren't canning jars, gone.

Toddler jeans, gone, to a toddler.

Baby clothes, meant for gifts, gone to a baby that needs clothes.

Kerosene lamp, gone to a friend.   

Racks from the old freezer, spices leftover from co-op days, baby quilts I don't know the maker of, gone.  

There's the bag I carried all my medical supplies and toiletry items for the kids and I when we went on trips.  It's a lovely bag, but too big now, and I have others I like better.   It's hard to give up something with a lot of memories.  

It's gone now.

And the "bun warmer" I found at a junk shop.  It's a round aluminum pan like a round casserole dish with rounded lid, meant to put on a stove burner with a little water under the steamer basket to warm bread, and was used before microwaves were in common use in the home.  I bought one when we had to wait several weeks to get a new microwave.  I bought it because when I was a girl at home, I warmed leftovers in it.  I didn't like to eat breakfast, but at our house you didn't go to school without eating something, so mom let me eat whatever I could get down, and it was often warmed over last night's supper.  

In the bun warmer.

  I like that memory, so I wanted one.  

It's gone.  I don't need a bun warmer to remember those times.

I had a lovely visit with a cousin this week, and we remembered some things that belonged to our grandparents.  It is nice to remember them, but we can't keep everything, and we don't need things to remember them.  We made memories there than no one can take away, and they weren't about things. 

There are a lot of other things that I can't remember and I don't want to in case I might miss them, gone.

And it feels really, really good. 

July Hair

A lot of  things have been going on in July besides growing hair.
 Time is marching on, normal things are going on. My hair is growing.
 Lynette has been dying to get her hands on my seemingly slow growing hair and French braid it.
 It is finally long enough to get a braid to stay in while it is soaking wet.  

The hair is rather cute, too bad the rest of the head is still the same.  

Of course, by now I can't remember what I did most of the month of July.  That is another thing that helps me feel that life is a lot closer to normal this summer than last.  Time is doing more than marching along, it is flying.  

I do remember what we did the last week.  

My mom has been promising to come and help us freeze corn.  My folks came on Thurs.  We also had some very special ladies come, too.  So, we were full up.  The day before everyone came I had all three grandsons for the day while my daughter attended a CNA recertification class or something like that.  

So, we froze the corn on Thursday, and I cooked a late supper.  Friday was a free day and my folks left.  Saturday, our special friends left, and I spent the rest of the day getting ready for the Kleeb family reunion, which takes place every other year on the fourth Sunday in July.  

This year was our turn to plan the reunion, which simply entails finding a place to have it, arrange for drinks and seating, and be there in time to oversee the eating.  We rather failed in this, so someone else found the building, but we did the rest.  We gathered in Broken Bow, 60 of us this year, more than usual.  The third generation, the first cousins are almost gone.  There are only two or three left.  Some family we don't know anything about or where they are, or any way to contact them.  But the ones that were there, we knew and enjoyed the visiting.  I was dead tired when I got home and after eating out, (no cooking being done by me after that day), and I went to bed soon after.  

The surprise of the weekend, was my folks deciding to come back Sunday night and do another day of corn freezing on Monday.  (They hadn't gone all the way home, they had been at a school reunion.) That was a big day.  My mom is a glutton for punishment.  We did 21 dozen ears, and got 77 pints of corn.  It took most of the day.  

Now, I should be able to rest.  Not.

Unless you call driving three hours to Omaha restful.  I had another doctor visit that day.  The usual kind where they examine me all over my head and neck on the outside, and my nose and sinuses on the inside.  I also had an MRI since it has been a year since the first after surgery one.  They just scanned my head, so it didn't take very long.  I was so tired that I was able to relax.  

After that, we ate at Popeye's Chicken.  I don't know what it is about chicken places and spice.  The chicken was good, but the green beans about burnt my mouth off.  KFC's were like that, too.  Then we went to see our friend who is recovering from a bone marrow transplant.  He is looking good, but in the throes of adjusting meds, and fatigue, and hydration, and eating.  None is particularly easy or quick, but as with all life changing events, medical or otherwise, small steps is the only way it's going to happen.  And is he going up, not down.  

So, I rested on the way home.  I rested so well, I fell asleep and I made everyone else find their own dinner.  

THEN,

on Wednesday, a week later, I rested.  

July Hair

P.S.  The scan results were: 

No change from the last time, and that's good news.

Normal Food

I discovered today that I can eat lots of different things.  In fact, I am beginning to suspect that I can eat most anything now as long as it isn't too dry. And even with those, learning the judicious use of water or milk while I chew and swallow will make all the difference.  

The nice thing about this is that I can eat other places without worrying about whether there will be food I can eat or not.
There is still one problem.  Certain spices, vinegar and some fruits just burn my mouth.  Pepper for sure is on the no go list, miracle whip (because of the vinegar), and chili powder are too.  I think garlic is another one.  Sometimes just a very small amount gives me no problem.   

I can usually eat most fruits; I eat until they bother me and then I quit.
I made hamburgers for dinner today.  I ate mine in a lettuce leaf, with tomato, it worked really well.  I would have used mayo, but we were out.  We had green bean casserole and beets.  No problems there. 

For supper we had ham sandwiches with mayo and fruit salad, and strawberry-rhubarb pie, eaten at some kind friends. I like pie, it is my favorite dessert at the moment.
I was proud of myself to having gone a whole day eating normal food.  I still like my soup.  It is the way I get most of my calories.  It takes me a long time to get down even small portions of "normal food".  Chewing with saliva helps mash up the food in your mouth more quickly. I chew and sip, and it just takes longer. Plus, I get tired of eating after awhile, since it gets boring after awhile eating food that doesn't have much taste.
In order to keep from losing any more weight I still need to eat lots of soup.

Sitting with the Grands

I had the boys a couple of days ago.  Mommy wanted to do a mammoth grocery shopping spree without trying to corral three kids and two carts, one with a baby in it.  So, she left the two big ones with me.  I haven't had a chance for a while to take pictures of Barry so I took the opportunity to crawl around on the floor with him. I'm still getting used to the camera of my dad's.  It is an older one, albeit, a very good one in it's day, but it is different from what I had before.

These boys played so nicely for about a half an hour and it was greatly appreciated.  Barry found the tractors and pushed them all over the kitchen. 

I'm disappointed this last photo is fuzzy, but I love his big smile.  I caught it on the fly, by accident.  I wanted him to smile; at their house its "say cheese", at my house its "no".

I made this playdough for the boys, and Zane just loves it.  I meant it to be dirt colored, but the combination of colors I used turned it green.  

He was playing farm animals for most of the time, preferring the giraffe and lion to the more traditional ones.  

Later, he began farming in earnest, but it was mainly getting the tractor stuck and pulling it out again.

The next day we had Christian all by himself.  He is such a good baby at nearly two months.  Sleeping easily and long and eating properly.  

It was easy to get a smile out of  him.  It wasn't so easy to quit talking and turn them off. 

Sleepy boy.